Clean it up

messy mind

A couple friends of ours came over for dinner last night. We shared stories and this wonderful calmed soul shared about her home intrusion a few years ago. She and her husband were still living in the city and would come up to their cabin in the mountains on the weekends. On this particular afternoon she walked alone into her home and found several people there, a disarray of personal items trashed all over, meth being cooked in her kitchen, a half a pizza still in the oven, and the invasion of strangers going through her stuff while residing in her sacred space. She began yelling and told the folks as they rallied to get out “to start cleaning up!” As she was sharing this story it was hard to conceive. She's so poised, gentle and collected. But, then again I cannot imagine what goes through anyone in stressful moments. We all react differently from what we think we would when exposed to fight or flight response. I asked her why she made them clean it up even though they took off (she could have been hurt as they were off their minds loaded on drugs). She said that it pissed her off to no end to see her house in that kind of chaos. She's a very clean and neat woman and I can only imagine the trigger it set off in her. She said that there has only been two times in her life that she screamed the way she did and that was one of them.

When they left last night I thought about my own invasions and intrusions. I thought about how great it would be if I could stop the thoughts in my brain with just a few words, “Hey, clean up this mess. Return the brain to its original format.” After all, our thoughts are in-house mechanisms. They control the body. If I could just step away and consciously stop the chaos, disarray and invasion of negativity, I can win the battle of ego vs. spirit.

We are complex beings. I often think about how hard it is to remain in this body for however long it takes us to learn the lessons we come here for. It's tough. It's rough at times. But, I believe that our biggest intruder in our lives are the thoughts that we carry around. We begin circling, chaotically entertaining the nonsense. We cook the addictions and sit back and trash any logical thought out of the area of optimism. We push and shove the spiritual intuitions into a closet and destroy ourselves in the process. We allow the invasion of Ego to take over, sometimes to the point of lying around and feeling the desperation. We call that survival but it's not.  It's actually the opposite.  We are giving into the martyr-ship, pity, and self-sabotage that the mind creates to shut us down and separate from our spiritual truth. That's when we need to say, while snapping our fingers in the air in a very stern manner, “Hey, hey, yo' no way...clean up right now! This is only a moment, a perception, and shift in consciousness! Get back on track! Stop!!!!”

I believe it's our human right to allow things to come up and out. It is also our divine right to stop the madness, the intrusions, the invasions of emotions that serve only for control through fear. We are programmed and wired to dive into the negative first through anxiety, expectations, what if's, and other ways that force us to unravel and feel fractured. No way! It stops here. If and when the next invasion of discomfort arrives...might be 10 minutes from now...I will stop myself, tell the little committee in my head to “clean it up and put things right back to how they were.” I want rainbows and unicorns up there. I want sunshine and happiness.  I don't need this crap messing up my day and forcing me stand on the edge of insanity when it was created by me all along. Have a blessed one, y'all!